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Daylite Savens Tiem

Yesterday, it became Daylight Savings Time. This is when the UK corrects the time. You see, half the year, we have the time wrong – and my body can tell this pretty easily. This morning, the first proper day of DST and – well, I’m up, awake. No problem, no hesitation. And I’m a heavy sleeper!

Oh by the way — I’m getting freaked out at how I’ll wake up from a dream, and before I’ve barely put my head back down, my alarm goes off. Are we psychic? It’s really getting on my nerves now.

Ode to Adobe Flash

Not even as fast as a Summer’s breeze

Because when Flash gets pissed, it will always freeze

My Work, My Work

You cry in horror

More Work, More Work

Due in tomorra’

Berzerk, Berserk

Insane you become

Because you’ve lost all will to work

By the time your Flash is done.

Dreamland

When we sleep, we sometimes dream. What do we do when we’re dreaming? What is that called? Why does it happen? Who made you authority on this subject? Then why am I asking you?

Dreaming. It gives me hope, it does. Gives me hope that we can somehow make ourselves into better people. Most of the time, our dreams seem to be influenced by what happened to us recently…

But what if stuff that happened to you recently, was influenced by your dreams? Don’t shoot me down here. I’m not implying clairvoyance here. I’m not implying we’re psychic.

What if people started acting like they do in their dreams, but in real life? What if the border between these two “worlds” became so blurred that we couldn’t control our actions, or our thoughts?

What if we start treating everyday life like a dream, like a vision? What if we took a “journey into our own dreams”, allthewhile becoming more and more delusional?

What if, we’ve spent ALL OUR TIME alone and afraid, that we’ve cushioned ourselves in an extra layer of reality?

See that person issuing parking tickets? I wonder if they’ll see my car – then what should I do? AND then, what do you do? You imagine it. You pass those situations around your mind and you plunge into finding an answer, finding how you’d react, the best way to fix the situation.

This is my problem. How does one go about fixing this?

I dreamt that I led people to their death, watched them jump off of a high bridge. Me? I had a sudden spout of understanding. BUT I DIDN’T WAKE UP FROM THE DREAM. I actually stood there, within the dream itself, KNOWING IT WAS A DREAM, discussing to myself exactly how dangerous it would be if I even considered doing the same thing in reality.

Thing is, I imagine it when I’m awake, too. I see tall buildings, high up places, and I always feel sick as I do. I imagine myself falling from them. Everytime I see a high up place, I imagine mself placing one foot on the edge, and kissing everything I’ve ever had, or indeed never had, goodbye.

I know I’d never do it. But I fear that what if the me that lives in this “dreamland” took over my psyche? What if, for one short moment dream-me would launch herself from the top of the highest building?

I get these visions all the time. I’m too scared to make the trip from my bed to the floor anymore.

A Long Time Ago, In A Galaxy Farzin Away

Mummy, I feel so ill! I can’t go to school today – I mean University.

So I’m doing Java work from home. We’re building trees.

Randomised trees.

Multiple randomised trees.

How fucking cool is that?

Although, something MULTIMEDIA and DESIGN related would be cooler.

I ain’t hatin’ though, what Lecturer F gets us making is far cooler than what Lecturer L gets us to make.

Here’s a random unrelated picture:

Jeremy from Jeremy & The Kyles.

The Console War.

Once upon a time, in a land far away

Lived a race called the humans, and they loved to play

Inmaginary worlds at their fingertips

They would travel the universe on magical trips

Without leaving their house, all this I decree

We travel the world with our PS3

From the musty tombs of Uncharted we ran

To the cold artic wastes in the sequel and then

We got lost in Space, searching for bolts

Which with to afford weapons that released powerful jolts

Playing as Ratchet, with Clank our buddy

We travel the world with our PS3

But on March 1st, 2010, an evil plan

Was hatched by Sony, an old hardware ban

Designed to make idiots shell out for new kit

All games that use trophies became unplayable shit

And you know what, I needed one of these for free

A giant black paperweight, the Ps3.

Spice Up Your Life

A lot of what I do? It’s dreaming. I hope that eventually, my dreams can become something useful. I pray that somehow, one day, I can be worth something, if only for a short moment. Of course, a dream is a dream. An ideal. It can never happen, not in a world where we are always under the veil of darkness and misery.

If only a world, like the one in Paprika, were real? A world where everyone can jump into and enjoy my delusion. Perhaps, those who suffer from dementia are already there.

My delusion? Of course, we all have our own delusions. Some of us dream of money, wealth. Some of us are looking for something we’ve lost. Some of us are looking for something we never had. Some of us are chasing those who have died. Those who have passed away. Those who comitted suicide. Those for whom we pulled the plug.

I seek love – no, I don’t. I had love, and I still have love. I seek to apply my love. To apply my love to person. To apply my love to an object, that would just be ridiculous. Perhaps I seek to apply my love to a project? An amalgam of all the things and feelings I have, all the thoughts and dreams, concepts and ideals, dysfunctions and delusions, all wrapped up into a package for the unsuspecting to open.

Three blog entries in one day. I need to sit down, take a rest, put my feet up. I don’t have the time to do so, but for twenty minutes, I should dream. And if my dream is good enough, I might give it… another twenty minutes.

The argument is whether it’s bad Usability or bad User Ability.

This is exciting. I have to do a website usability review. No, really – to ascertain how good/bad a website is. Comment on the way it looks, what it does, what works, what doesn’t, what could be improved, you know the drill.

After that though, I’ve got this sweet notion that I’ll bomb through a couple of songs on DDR Universe. Life, the universe and everything. How I am right now? I could stay like this forever.

Well, I couldn’t. Everything dies in the end. When my end comes, I just want each of you, my wonderful friends, to know that I was there for you, although you never called on me.

Enjoy life. Because someday, one day… We’ll say live life, I know. Hold on, hold tight. Don’t let go, and don’t lose sight. Amen.

That Which Drives Us

Thinking about mortality, dear reader(s).

Life is something we’re told is valuable. I can see why we think it’s valuable, because we’re given a faux “free-will”, whereas we are still controlled. Our thoughts are controlled, our actions are controlled, yada yada.

As people we have to make decisions, but these decisions are ALREADY made for us. They’re made for us at birth. When the child is taken from the mother, the future chosen for them is stamped into them. Those who aren’t born in a hospital, or under supervision from a doctor, are stamped at the next feasible opportunity.

Everyone has a name given to them that is not the one planned by their parents — or is it? How much of your name is something that was a choice as opposed to random mind control?

But this theory has a flaw. I’m discussing here the plausibility of all this being true. Thing is, if there’s no such thing as free will, then I’m being forced to write this blog entry. And if that is the case, then what do the people controlling me achieve? That is why this theory could never exist within our world.

But within another world? A world that is slightly different from ours.

A “wounded” world, perhaps.